An Answer to a Prayer

I mentioned to Cory just yesterday that half the time I don't even think Cam likes me anymore. It has been hard for me to have him become so independent and grown up. Although the sensible side of me knows that is what is supposed to happen. I don't think I have ever met another mother and son that are as close as we once were. He is my only child and we have spent a lot of time away from family and most often alone. We also have very similar personalities and we just have always seemed to get along and enjoy each other's company. We still do - it is just difficult to get a sense of how Cam feels about me. He gives me the cursory kiss and "love you" each night before bed - but I miss our old life when he needed me and enjoyed me above anyone else. (You guys with younger boys just wait!) I guess society expects boys to be tough and not sensitive and to not show too much emotion. So with that said - Cam is probably acting like he is supposed to - but sometimes it hurts and I miss my little boy who was sensitive and didn't mind showing it. Anyway, yesterday I was saying that to Cory while we were driving. I have been thinking about it a lot lately - worrying I guess. If I am not close to my only child what do I really have? So...this morning as I am going about emptying garbage's in all the bathrooms - just the Monday morning routine. I see this paper with writing on it, a school assignment of some kind, all crumpled up right on top of Cam's garbage. Yes, of course I smoothed it out to read it! Cory thinks that is wrong - I didn't give it a second thought. (If he really didn't want it read he would have torn it up right?) My heart stopped when I realized what it said - and really it was as if in answer to a prayer. It started with "I would have to say my biggest inspiration is my mom..." He goes on to say how he feels about me and that he hopes he can be like me someday. Aaagghhh - those moments of feeling appreciated are so few and far between when it comes to teenagers. I want to frame it! (But I don't want him to know I read it and not trust me with his garbage anymore - there may be future treasures there.)